Christmas decorating

The house looks amazing! I love Christmas! It is truely a joyful time of year. Even if you are not doing well, it still brings joy. I was getting my hair done today and they played Christmas music the whole time. I told my hairdresser that I just cannot get into the Christmas mood yet. It has been hard. It is one of those things, like I said earlier, you just go through the emotions. That dear ol' phrase...Fake It til you Make it. Actually, with the house all Christmasy and knowing pretty much what Im getting everyone, it has brought me some real happiness. I know I dont show it and I have relized that for some reason I am just afriad or unable to show emotion and I am afraid to be happy for sure. but that doesnt mean that I dont want to. That doenst mean that i cant. I can. Some day, I will. I was getting close til i had the last few months that I have had. I will get back there again. I just need time. This is not easy, but God is stronger than this. I believe that. We have a beautiful manger scene up. I will have to take a picture and put it on here. It just brings the real meaning of Christmas to our house. We have so many decorations up. It is perfect.